A Taste of the SAHM Life: Pros/Cons from a Working Mom's Eyes

Now that I am back to work, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on my recent maternity leave. This time off from work not only gave me the special and necessary time to be with my newborn son, it also gave me the opportunity to experience life as a Stay At Home Mom. This can best be summed up in a Pros/Cons list of being a SAHM from my perspective. Interesting enough, many of the Pros are also Cons!

Pros:

• Not getting ready for work in the morning – Many mornings we would be playing in the driveway out in front of our house (on a relatively busy street). As I watched many people drive by rushing to get to work on time, I felt happy to be hanging out in my sweatpants just enjoying the morning with my kids and not rushing around to get kids dropped off and get to work on time.
• Being with my kids all the time – Getting to experience all those special moments throughout the day is so priceless. Whether it’s building a new train track route with my 3 yr old while the baby sleeps, or having a “cooing” session with my baby -- these are the moments that make being a mother the best in the world! :)  
• Teaching my kids new things – Watching my 3 year old’s face light up when he masters a new puzzle that I just taught him is also priceless. I love introducing new things to my kids and watching them learn and grow – that also helps me grow as a mother.
• Spending time with my SAHM friends – As is the premise of this blog, my best friend Beth is a SAHM and we don’t get to see each other very much because of both of our busy and different schedules. During my leave, we were able to set up some “playdates” which helped the kids work out some energy and gave us the chance to also spend some nice time together.

Cons:

•  Not getting ready for work in the morning – Some of those mornings, as I watched people driving by all dressed up for work and sipping coffee alone in their cars, I was a little jealous of them.
• Being with my kids all the time – Although I love my kids with ALL my heart and soul, I do enjoy having a little time to myself when I can. Even if it’s just to run an errand. Going to work gives me the opportunity to have some alone time to my own thoughts in the car on the way to/from work. And even the chance to run into Target (alone!!) on my lunch break. (And Lord knows I spend enough at Target on my own without the need to buy additional snacks or toys to keep my son happy during a shopping trip!).
• Teaching my kids new things – As much as I think I am a good mother to my kids, I am not naive enough to think that I know everything they need to learn. I love that they also get to learn from our babysitter whose kids are older and who has a lot more experience and creativity than I do!
• Missing my working life – As much as I love my role as a mom, I also love my role as a working woman. As I have stated before, I am not someone who hates my job. I enjoy what I do and feel like it is part of what makes me, me. It also connects me to other things going on in the world. When I was home, I was completely out of the loop in terms of world news, politics, etc. (wait, maybe this should go on the “Pros” list! Ha!). But, it was hard to feel like a part of society having no idea what in the world is going on outside of our four walls.
• Resenting husband – As a SAHM, I found myself watching the clock every day at 5pm waiting for Daddy to come home to hand off the kids so I could finally take that shower I had been wishing to take all day. I was jealous and even resentful of him that he “got” to go to work all day, converse with adults, and come home to just play with the kids and be the “fun” one. Meanwhile, I was the one trying to meet everyone’s needs all day, while also feeding, grooming, cleaning, teaching, and disciplining. It was exhausting and also somewhat strained our relationship. Feeling like we are true equal partners in parenting by both working and having relatively equal time with the kids seems to make our relationship better too.
• Missing that extra income – My maternity leave was only partially paid, so my husband and I also got to experience life without my full portion of our income. Although we were able to get by, let’s just say that we had to tighten the purse strings a bit. It was not easy!

All in all, I would say that my recent taste of the SAHM life has left me with two thoughts: 1) I respect SAHM’s very much – their job is not easy by any means and 2) I’m still overall happy with my decision to be a working mom. I do admit that I feel like I have the best of both worlds though – I am working from home a couple days per week (with a sitter), which does help me also have some of the SAHM “Pros” on my list!

- Michelle

Guest Blog #1: Career-Mom Balancing Act

In response to our call for "Guest Bloggers," our friend Nancy submitted this awesome blog about her most recent experiences and reflections as a working mom.  Enjoy!  And as always, we would love to hear your comments/thoughts/questions!

I'm a career mom with ambitions to do "everything" - I don't even know where to begin with this topic. I guess I'll start with the part that I've known my husband for 13 years and up until this year when his cousin graduated from medical school and started residency, I was the ONLY working woman in their family, 4 generations of us females, who had a career. Go cousin, for upping the quota with me in the family! I bring this up because it would be a little disingenuous to pretend this doesn't add a little more pressure to be a "good mom".


So I thought it would be a great idea to take my husband's 89 year old grandmother to a movie last Sunday to answer her frequent question of "how do you do it?". I wanted to spend some time with her and also take her out for her birthday - Except that when I checked to confirm our plans and movie times that very movie with that title was in the theater for 2 weeks and didn't last long. I'm hoping it was just a terrible movie and not that there were so few who could relate! I suppose I'll just revert back to my standard answer of "i just do it."

I am a mom who also doesn't hate working. I find myself in a euphoric rush one minute flying to 4 cities in 2 days for my travel-heavy work life. And in the next minute bummed when I say goodnight over skype and give virtual hugs to my 3 year old twin girls. (Except that they really hug the Mac and I'm afraid our facetime will soon be hindered with an overhugged home computer). But I do love what I do and I do love being a mom more. Doesn't sound possible, but I swear, I love being a mom more than I love my job - even if some may think that actions don't speak louder than words. I swear I'm a bit naive too because I never, ever believed that having a family would slow down my productivity. My old work colleague used to say to me jokingly, "you're never going to be the same when you have a family". Five years ago I used to tell him that was crazy. But he was right. It's not the same and i'll admit there are times that I wish i didn't have to shut down to rush to pick up the girls from daycare. But at the same time there are plenty of mornings i wake up and think - I wish I could just snuggle with my babies. Somehow the balance just happens --- but some stamina and a little overdrive...and a very good extended family network.

So i'll end my guest blog with the Women In Leadership event I went to last night. I will admit, I'm not a huge fan of such affiliations. At a former company we had a women in sales networking session every year. And there was one woman who was the speaker every year. Yep - because there were slim pickings of female executives to represent. But I always remember chuckling when every year her speech involved her life experiences --- yes, she climbed the ladder but she was never married, moved 2 dozen times for the company and never had a family. No offense, I wasn't inspired. So last night the keynote was a business line president for a major insurance company ---- when she introduced herself i saw the eyebrows raise around the room ---- then she said she has six children and the facial expressions changed to, "HOW COULD THAT BE?!" I do believe you can have it all --- with a little sacrifice all around --- call it my naivete again but I do. I don't however see it too often. I so badly wanted to raise my hand and ask, "Does your husband stay home?" I refrained because I'd like to keep going on thinking that she balances it all with a dual-working family. I guess I'll never know.

"Balancing Act"

There was an article in The Plain Dealer the other day called, "Balancing Act: Don't Know How Mom Does It? Moms Tell..." In it, Cindy Krischer Goodman interviews high-powered career women, who also happen to be moms, to find out how they juggled responsibilities. One interview in the article recapped a day in the life of one of these "supermoms":

"Last week, Mevs, a Haitian-American, found herself reviewing for a test with her youngest daughter in Miami in the morning, pitching one of her company's projects to a loan officer in Haiti in the afternoon and talking over a new development with her business partners in the evening."

WOW! The article went on to tell similar stories, and it really made me think about what a "supermom" life would be like...and to be honest, I am just not sure I'd be cut out for it. I had a small taste of what working moms deal with for one week this summer when I volunteered to be a camp counselor at our church's Vacation Bible School. OK-- some of you working moms might be laughing at my comparison of camp counselor to high-powered business woman-- but let me tell you, I was exhausted!!!! And it did give me a bit of insight into how working moms feel. The sheer panic of getting myself and two kids dressed and ready for the day on time at the crack of dawn, the utter mess my house was in when we walked out the door in the morning, the exhaustion I felt when we came back home to that same messy house-- for that week, NOTHING got done!!  I was emotionally and physically drained-- much too drained to prepare a healthy dinner, clean up the house, sort the laundry, or do anything else that needed attention at home. Granted, this might just be my personality, and I was 16 wks pregnant at the time, but still, it gave me some perspective. How I admire the moms who do this every day!!! I know people do what they need to do, but given the choice, would I choose it?? I still watch the women heading to work, looking all together and polished, with a concrete purpose for the day, and feel a tiny bit envious-- you "supermoms" make it look so easy! But having had a taste (a very small taste, but still!), I would be afraid my mind would be too scattered, my body too exhausted to get everything done that needed to be.  Again, a big part of it could be my personality, and perhaps I am just too used to staying home at this point...but my hat goes off to all the women who pull everything together and get it done-- I am impressed!!

And I truly wonder: How DO you do it??!!!

Finding the Best Childcare Solution

As a working mom, one of the most frequently asked questions that I get is: “who takes care of your kids while you are at work?” And no doubt, for all working moms, finding childcare that is suitable for us and our children is certainly one of the biggest challenges for us to overcome. The guilt that comes with being away from our children can only partially be replaced with at least a feeling of comfort that our children are in good hands with someone who will care for them, love them, and even teach them things that perhaps we can’t. At the same time, it is important to find a solution that is affordable and also works with our schedules and logistics of getting to work, etc. Lining all of these objectives up, however, can be quite the challenge!

As I prepare to head back to work full-time following maternity leave and with now two kids at home, this issue continues to thrive in my brain. In theory, it seems easier for me and my schedule to find a good nanny to come to my house every day. But, with a very active almost 3 yo, I also feel like it is also good for him to be able to get out and play in a different environment on a regular basis.

Since he was a newborn, my 2.5 yo Jimmy has had a little of both scenarios. A couple days per week he goes to daycare at the home of our babysitter Lisa who watches a couple other kids as well. It is here that I feel he has benefitted so much from his daily interaction with other kids his age. He has developed friendships and social skills that I’m not sure I could have taught him on my own. Lisa, an experienced nanny and mom herself, has also provided a good learning environment and taught him things through play that I definitely know I couldn’t have done myself. She has even taught me things to do at home with him!

For the other days each week, we have had a babysitter at our home. I think those days are also nice for Jimmy (and now my newborn John) to just be in the comforts of home - not to mention more convenient to not have to get them ready and out the door with me. We have been fortunate to find college students for this role, one of which is now going to be our full-time sitter 3 days per week. These girls have been so great with Jimmy and he seems to enjoy playing with them just as much. So much so, that I rarely have to sneak out the door anymore and he will actually sit in the window with them when I leave and wave “bye bye.” I feel like he has learned to be comfortable with me or my husband leaving because he knows we will be back and this is important in his development too.

I feel fortunate to have found a good childcare balance for my specific situation for now. Just like everything else though, the potential of things changing is always a possibility. What if one or both of my babysitters decided to quit (fingers crossed this doesn’t happen anytime soon!) – then what would I do? What will I do once Jimmy starts preschool next fall? Will my newborn thrive the same way Jimmy has in this setup? Oy! I think I could drive myself crazy with all the “what ifs!” I have to continue to remind myself to just take everything as it comes – it has worked out for me thus far.

So I am curious – what do other working moms out there do for childcare? I am always interested in hearing other situations and opinions on what has worked well – or not - for others.

And also – do any SAHM’s have any thoughts on this? What would you do for childcare if you decided to go back to work?

- Michelle

Back to Reality

Well, I feel we have to apologize again to our followers for a lack of activity over the past couple months, but as Beth mentioned last week, it’s been a VERY busy summer! I’m sure everyone can relate. Speaking of followers though, it was heartening to get some new followers recently even when we weren’t posting! We promise now to get back on it. I think I can speak for both of us when I say we need this “blog therapy” and to hear from other moms too so we can all stay sane!

As Beth also mentioned, my family dynamic has changed a bit as I added another son, John, to the mix in July! Being on maternity leave for 12 weeks and experiencing a taste of the SAHM life has definitely given me some new perspectives on things. To say the working mom “dilemma” has increased for me is an understatement! On one hand, I have loved being at home with my now two children, experiencing life through their eyes, and just being “mommy.” On the other, I am a little anxious/excited to get back to work – using my “adult brain” for problem solving and working on important client projects.

At any rate, it is Back to Reality for me very soon so for now I am going to have to just figure out how to re-configure my juggling act times two! I have 1.5 weeks until I go back to work full time and am on a mission to get organized the best I can by then in order to keep things running smoothly. It should be very interesting and I can already forsee many blog topics to come!

By the way, I am reading the book “I Don’t Know How She Does It” right now and LOVING it! I wanted to read it before I saw the movie. Beth and I plan to go see the movie soon too. It will be interesting to see what each of us take away from it. Stay tuned!!

- Michelle

Thoughts on a busy summer...

So summer is over, and I never thought it could be so busy with just two kids under five! From swimming lessons every day, to Vacation Bible School, to family vacations, to potty training my 2yo, to preparations for a family wedding we were all in-- PHEW-- I was ready for fall! But there were so many moments when I thought to myself, "this is a great experience to write about..." so I am excited to buckle down this fall and add some new topics to the blog. And if I thought my summer was busy and filled with new experiences as a mom, I know Michelle will have me beat-- she gave birth to her second beautiful baby boy in July! So from going from one child to two, to having the "SAHM experience" during her 3 month maternity leave, I know she'll have some great new perspectives to add to our discussion as well.

We hope your summer was fun-filled, and we look forward to hearing your thoughts and perspectives on some of the topics we'll write about this fall-- Happy blogging!

Calling for Guest Bloggers!

Thanks again to everyone for following, reading, and commenting on The Mommy Gap to date! We love all the comments and discussions that have been generated so far and look forward to much, much more!

With that in mind, we have had numerous conversations with other moms who also have great stories to share about their perspectives on being a working mom or a stay at home mom (or a little of both!). We would like to invite anyone who would like to share their thoughts on these topics to write a Guest Blog for The Mommy Gap. If interested, please email your blog to us at: themommygap@gmail.com.

We look forward to reading your personal stories, insights, and perspectives – and sharing these with other moms on The Mommy Gap!

Thanks!

- Michelle & Beth

Schizophrenia

After re-reading some of my recent posts and reflecting, I am starting to feel like I suffer from a bit of schizophrenia. There are many days that I feel very confident about my decision to be a working mom and others that I am conflicted. For example, take a recent week:

Day One: After a rough morning dealing with my two year old son Jimmy who for some reason refuses to get dressed and is running around the house in only a diaper (I now know why they call it “Terrible Twos” – ha!), I find myself relieved to greet the babysitter and duck out the door to get to my office. Mind you, I am going to my office to for a day of conference calls, emails, and report writing, but today that sounds more appealing!

Day Two: Woke up late – it was nice that Jimmy actually slept in until 7:30, but now we are getting a late start to our day. On Tuesdays, he goes to a babysitter’s home for the day, so I not only have to get myself ready for work, but also get him dressed and ready, and pack his bag and lunch for the day. As I struggle to catch him to put his shoes on as he is running around the house, I am breaking a sweat in the process and ruining my freshly applied makeup. I begin to wonder what it would be like to just be hanging out in my pajamas and bathrobe with him while we eat breakfast before a day of playing together at the park or on a “playdate” that SAHM’s talk about so much.

Day Three: Big presentation today at work. My husband drops Jimmy off at the sitter’s house today so I can get to work early to prepare. Meeting goes well and so does presentation. Client is happy, and I feel a sense of personal satisfaction. I once again feel totally confident in my decision to work – like I need this in my life too.

Day Four: I walk Jimmy into the babysitter’s house and he pulls me by the hand over to play with a toy with him. Unbeknownst to him, he is also pulling at my heart strings as I think to myself I should be doing this with him all day, every day. The fact of the matter though is within minutes he is totally happy playing with the other kids and other toys that we don’t have at home. I kiss him goodbye and he runs off to play with the other kids at the play kitchen, and I feel proud that he has developed such good social skills being around these other kids on a regular basis.

Day Five: I take Jimmy to a class at the “The Little Gym” (a topic itself for another day!) and feel a little like a SAHM. Afterwards, we rush home to meet the babysitter and I scoot out the door to get to my office. There, I am able to get a lot of work done, cross a bunch a things off my “To Do” list (including a few personal things like running an errand or two on my lunch break!), and feel very productive going into the weekend. The flexibility of my job on this day, allows me to feel confident again in my decision to be working and that I am managing a good work/life balance.

The purpose of all this is to not bore you all with my day to day actions, but more about the range of emotions and thoughts that go through my head on a daily and weekly basis as a working mom. I wonder – can other working moms relate to this? Or am I just a crazy schizophrenic?! :)

- Michelle

Celebrating Staying at Home

After reading through the blog recently (and getting some very honest feedback from a good friend), I started noticing that my blogs were sounding a little defeated-- as if I only have complaints and worries as a SAHM-- and I SO don't want to sound like that! It is certainly NOT how I feel. I definitely do have days that are challenging, just like we all do, but I have so many more days and moments spent with my kids that are filled with such joy and wonder and fulfillment-- and I need to write about those days too. Today happened to be one of those days.

Today we had no plans (which can lead to either bliss or disaster for a SAHM), and I had been thinking of taking the girls to the Natural History Museum for a while. A friend was going to meet us, but she couldn't make it, so I almost bagged the idea, until Abby reminded me that she wanted to see the dinosaurs. So we all got dressed, packed a lunch, and drove downtown on a chilly, windy, rainy Thursday. I had no expectations for how the girls would do (Lily hates being in a stroller these days, but is still not trustworthy walking around in a crowd), but we plowed ahead anyway. Sure enough, Lily stayed in her stroller for less than 5 minutes before she screamed to get out, and out she went...and she did great!! The museum was not crowded at all, and she and Abby walked around together squealing with delight while showing me the stuffed alligator, the "tree boat", the "T-Rex with tiny arms", the "fishie" fossils, the planets and stars, and so on. There were no tantrums, no fighting-- just a wonderfully simple day spent together. After having lunch, and walking through again to see our favorite things one more time, we drove home tired and ready for naps. We had such a great time that I even bought an annual family pass (something I am known for doing at every establishment, much to my husband's dismay). I realize that the next time we go might not be quite as smooth as today, but that's ok. I will cherish today as a day I feel privileged and thankful to be a SAHM with two such amazing kids.

-Beth

"Mommy Personalities"

So I am watching Sister Wives (a reality show on TLC about a polygamist family with 4 wives, for those of you who are not reality addicts like myself!), and they were just discussing how some of the moms in the family do better staying at home, and some do better working outside the home. This got me wondering if there really are different "mommy personalities"...?? I have often heard moms (some good friends included) say, "I could never stay at home all day with the kids" or "I could never leave my kids and go to work." But those are strong statements, and I wonder if they are really true?? I can see both sides-- I suppose it does take a certain personality to stay home all day, dealing with tantrums, messes, play dates, and endless trips to the zoo, park, etc. And I suppose it takes a certain personality to successfully juggle a career and family life. But it seems to me that we all have a little bit of each, no?? I think it would be hard to find a SAHM who didn't once think about the freedom and personal satisfaction of having a career; and it would be equally hard to find a working mom who doesn't wonder if she should be at home with her children. But I guess that is the whole reason we started this blog, because when it comes down to it, we believe there is a little of both personalities in each of us.

Definitely a thought-provoking subject brought up on my usually mindless reality TV, so I was inspired to blog about it-- thank you Sister Wives! (haha)

-Beth

Little Reminders

With my son finally over his bug, this week’s business trip went much smoother! My business meetings also went really well. Its times like this that the idea of “I CAN do this” starts to creep back into my mind. I am learning as I go though, not to get too cocky as incidents like last week can and most certainly will happen again. I am typically a “planner” and wish there was a way that I could be better prepared for next time, but I’m not really sure that is even possible.

So, for now I am back on my balance beam – walking that fine line between having a career and being a mom. And today, I am wearing the career hat. I had a great meeting with a client who was very impressed with the work I have done so far and we discussed some important next steps in our project. I’m feeling confident and also excited to keep moving this project along and continue the success.

After the meeting today, I went to dinner – and that’s where it hit me. As I sat at a sidewalk café in San Francisco enjoying the gorgeous weather and my dinner, I saw a woman with a little boy who was probably close to two years old. She was carrying his sippy cup and a “snak trap” cup (btw - great invention if you don’t already have one of these), and they stopped to pet a dog on the sidewalk. The little boy was so excited to pet the dog and was smiling and looking at his mom.

At this moment, I was quickly reminded of my son at home and was suddenly missing him terribly. Now, don’t get me wrong, I always MISS my son when I am traveling, but admittedly it is also nice to enjoy a quiet dinner prepared by a chef and in an environment that doesn’t include a toddler throwing his dinner on the floor. But at this particular moment and seeing this little boy interact with his mom, I suddenly longed to be back at home with my own son. All I could think about was his smile and his little voice telling me a story (even if I can only understand about half of what he is saying!).

It’s these little reminders that keep me in check. I am reminded that he will grow up quickly and I need to enjoy all these moments with him while I can. Although I am not ready to completely walk away from work, I need to remember that it will technically always be there, but this time with my son will not. It’s these little reminders that keep me wondering if perhaps it’s time to think hard about making some changes in my life and my schedule.

- Michelle

What comes next??

For me, one of the perks of being a SAHM is being able to take Abby to school every day, pick her up, and occasionally volunteer in her classroom. I have been able to be a "room mommy" often over the past few months, and have gotten to know the kids and the class routine well. This past Tuesday, though, was the first time that being in Abby's class made me seriously miss teaching. I feel so at home in a classroom-- I miss having my own! I even felt a bit jealous watching the teachers make small talk across the hallway, or huddle closely to discuss the latest school gossip. It really got me excited at the prospect of teaching again someday. But when I really started thinking about it, I began to panic-- when will I go back?? Will I be prepared for the changes since I was in a classroom?? Will I even be hired anywhere?? This mini panic-attack lead to the much bigger question: what comes next for a SAHM??

So after mulling this over for a while, I planned to bring it up to two of my closest SAHM friends last night over wine. Surprisingly, though, one of THEM brought up the topic, saying something along the lines of, "I am starting to wonder about what I'll do when the kids are all grown up and don't need me as much." Bingo! That got us all talking about things we were interested in, and things we could possibly see ourselves doing in the future. The whole conversation completely validated my fears of what comes next-- I am not the only SAHM who feels this way! We didn't really come to any conclusions last night because we all want more kids, and we all want to continue staying home for now, but the conversation opened up a topic we had never really touched on before, and was so refreshing; it was just about US, instead of kids, and babies, and husbands, and houses...all topics that can tend to monopolize the SAHM conversations. I love being home taking care of my girls, my husband, and my house...but there are definitely dreams I have for myself that are JUST for me, whether it's teaching again, or something else, and I know my other SAHM friends have them too. It's one of the things that I envy about Michelle and other working moms-- not just that they get paid and get healthy doses of adult time-- but that they have something for themselves. As a SAHM, sometimes having anything for yourself is last on the list. But I hope that by continuting to discuss our dreams for ourselves we can help each other keep them alive-- and eventually make some of them a reality.
-Beth

How Quickly Things Change!

How quickly things change!  As I read my post from just 5 days ago, I can almost laugh at the confidence that I eluding to regarding my decision to be a "working mom"....   

Now, here I sit in the airport with tears in my eyes and feeling like the worst mom on the planet for leaving my sick 2 year old at home to go on a business trip.  Three days ago when he first got sick, I thought to myself, "well, at least he will be OK by the time I have to leave for this trip on Monday."  But instead, this morning he was still wanting to cling to Mommy and just lay on my lap on the couch.  Who didn't (or doesn't now!) want that when they are sick?  I can remember that feeling as a little kid - when I was sick, only Mommy could make me feel just a little bit better. 

And this is exactly where my split personality comes to the forefront and I am torn in two different ways:

1.  Part of me feels like home is where I should be - comforting my baby and just being "Mom" to him, a.k.a. the only person in the whole wide world that can make him feel comforted.  And I love that role - it's like nothing I have ever felt before.  It's rewarding, heart-warming, and even purposeful - like this is what I was put on this earth to do and to be. 

2.  But, the other part of me feels commited to my work.  I have earned this position of stature and responsibility and have people who count on me.  Now don't get me wrong - hands down, my son and my family come first.  But, it is also important to me to follow through on work commitments.  It's not in me to just drop the ball and let people down.  I work hard and feel that I do a good job, and that is also very rewarding to me.

I honestly thought that as a working mom in today's world, I could really "have it all" - meaning being a perfect mom and still also have success in career - was I being naive?

- Michelle

One Day At A Time

Last week was one of those weeks where I really questioned whether I should be working or staying home.... It started when my nanny had to have emergency surgery and we had no backup childcare options that were available for the week. Add in an ice storm that knocked the power line off our house, then a busted water pipe in the basement. All that combined with an extremely busy week at work packed with meetings, project deadlines, and other responsibilities that had to be met - and I'll I can say is: Ahhhhhhh!! I was scrambling to find some part-time babysitters so I could run into my office (which thankfully is relatively close) for just a couple hours to get at least a little bit done, while also juggling plumber and electrician appointments. All the while, in the back of my mind was a little voice saying, “If you didn’t work, you could eliminate a lot of this stress.”

But, even having gone through all that craziness last week, there is still a bigger part of me that continues to thrive on having the responsibilities at work - the feeling of accomplishment of completing a big project, or presentation, or meeting. And even though it was a stressful week juggling everything, it still feels worth it to me. I still feel comfortable with my decision to work and confident that my son is also thriving.  I just have to keep in mind that all I can do is take everything one day at a time – and this where I’m at today.

I'm so glad to be blogging again. I realized that writing this and also reading Beth's posts is very cathartic for me. It's comforting to know that I am not alone in my struggles to balance mommy-hood with life's other responsibilities.

- Michelle

We're still here!!

Ok, so it's been about 9 months since our last post-- but we are still here!! Motherhood is nutty, and the days are flying by-- but this blog is important to us, so here we are! In the spirit of the blog, I have to say that today was one of THOSE days-- husband out of town, no activities or school, and VERY bored and cranky 2 and 4 year olds-- it was all I could do to not crawl under the bed and hide from the constant, "MOMMY!! MOMMY!!" all day long. It made my husband's empty hotel room he called from sound like paradise. The whole day got me wondering if I would be a more relaxed, patient mom if I worked outside the home...or would I be more stressed out because of the extra responsibilities that work would bring...? But since job-sharing is hard to come by for teachers around here, and Ryan and I are talking about baby #3, I won't find out anytime soon. In the meantime, I pray for patience, and hope tomorrow is easier...!!

~Beth