After re-reading some of my recent posts and reflecting, I am starting to feel like I suffer from a bit of schizophrenia. There are many days that I feel very confident about my decision to be a working mom and others that I am conflicted. For example, take a recent week:
Day One: After a rough morning dealing with my two year old son Jimmy who for some reason refuses to get dressed and is running around the house in only a diaper (I now know why they call it “Terrible Twos” – ha!), I find myself relieved to greet the babysitter and duck out the door to get to my office. Mind you, I am going to my office to for a day of conference calls, emails, and report writing, but today that sounds more appealing!
Day Two: Woke up late – it was nice that Jimmy actually slept in until 7:30, but now we are getting a late start to our day. On Tuesdays, he goes to a babysitter’s home for the day, so I not only have to get myself ready for work, but also get him dressed and ready, and pack his bag and lunch for the day. As I struggle to catch him to put his shoes on as he is running around the house, I am breaking a sweat in the process and ruining my freshly applied makeup. I begin to wonder what it would be like to just be hanging out in my pajamas and bathrobe with him while we eat breakfast before a day of playing together at the park or on a “playdate” that SAHM’s talk about so much.
Day Three: Big presentation today at work. My husband drops Jimmy off at the sitter’s house today so I can get to work early to prepare. Meeting goes well and so does presentation. Client is happy, and I feel a sense of personal satisfaction. I once again feel totally confident in my decision to work – like I need this in my life too.
Day Four: I walk Jimmy into the babysitter’s house and he pulls me by the hand over to play with a toy with him. Unbeknownst to him, he is also pulling at my heart strings as I think to myself I should be doing this with him all day, every day. The fact of the matter though is within minutes he is totally happy playing with the other kids and other toys that we don’t have at home. I kiss him goodbye and he runs off to play with the other kids at the play kitchen, and I feel proud that he has developed such good social skills being around these other kids on a regular basis.
Day Five: I take Jimmy to a class at the “The Little Gym” (a topic itself for another day!) and feel a little like a SAHM. Afterwards, we rush home to meet the babysitter and I scoot out the door to get to my office. There, I am able to get a lot of work done, cross a bunch a things off my “To Do” list (including a few personal things like running an errand or two on my lunch break!), and feel very productive going into the weekend. The flexibility of my job on this day, allows me to feel confident again in my decision to be working and that I am managing a good work/life balance.
The purpose of all this is to not bore you all with my day to day actions, but more about the range of emotions and thoughts that go through my head on a daily and weekly basis as a working mom. I wonder – can other working moms relate to this? Or am I just a crazy schizophrenic?! :)
- Michelle
This "mommy blog" is for all moms out there who are working in and out of the home, from the perspective of two best friends with completely different "mommy lives" (one with a successful career in business and one who stays home), but the same fundamental goal: to be the best moms we can be. Our purpose is to bridge the gap between the two different "mommy worlds" based on our two perspectives in experiencing the ups and downs of each, all while maintaining our 12-year-and-counting friendship.
